Hi. My name is Andrea. I m here to tell you about Jesus, and how He is present in my life. I m here to share with you my experiments, my strugglings, and give you motivation in your life.
Today is july 14.
It was a mmm… little hard day..but bearable…
Last day i was on the field to help my uncle s on the farm with the clay. We started to work but then a huge rain came and i got very wet. Today i felt a little weak, and my throat and head and eyes didn t feel so well. I had also a lot of strugglings, and mainly, bcs I really hoped that I m going to meet with my boyfriend today, since he came here to Romania last weekend and stays only a couple of days, then travels back to Usa. Of course we didn t meet, hardly even talked and I m having a very hard time, bcs our relationship isn t even close where it eas at the beginning.
Sooo, what did I do all day? I was reading Bible verses on internet sites, and listening to Nick Vujicic, the famous limbless evanghelist.
What I learned or experienced today is, that I really need to go by my faith. I NEED to follow my faith whatever happens, bcs a lot temptations and obstacles are trying to hinder me from peace and joy.
I had a very hard six months lately, and mentally and psichically I was suffering a looot. Now I m a lot better, since I really decided to follow my faith, and trust in God, but temptations doesn t stop, the evil of course wants me back in the earlier bad shape.
I had a lot issues even today, bothering thoughts, what tried to make me believe, that I m on a bad way toward Jesus, and I should do something to change it.
But! My faith told me, that I m perfectly on the right way, and there s nothing I can do to reach God, or to compelle to Him. It s only He, who can reach me, and heal me, and I ll be healed and saved by faith, not by acts.
So, I was struggling with this issue today, and I followed my faith and didn t fall in doubt. Now the struggling isn t so big, but it s hard, when I see that things aren t going how I would like, and to stay in faith even then.
It is very very very very hard, my friends! Buuuut, there comes a moment when I have to decide. Am I going to be the person I always wanted to be? Am I going to be someone, who I always talk about how should she/he be? I always tell to people how should they act. I talk with such a biiig passion about God, Jesus, faith, that we should believe, and always be grateful. And aways be passionate sooo much toward God. Ajd always be soo joyful in Him.
And I really mean it! I really think that s the way we should be. Then, who am I, to contradict to my own ideas, to not be the person I adviiise sooo passionately to others?
Here is the PERFECT opportunity so that I can use this goal in my life. It s the perfect time to show God, that no matter what, I m joyful in Him. I m grateful to Him, and I KNOW, that He has a PLAN for me! Exactly in this bad time, when I feel sooo fell apart, so helpless, so alone and discouraged. Exactly now is the time when I really need Him. Exactly now is the opportunity so that He heal my wounds, He use me for His plan, to step in my life and change it.
Remember: When you are the most broken, then you are the closest to God, you just HAVE to turn toward Him, so that you see Him.
So now, my dearest God and Jesus. Here I am! My heart is broken, and my hopes are gone, but I turn my face toward Your glory today, and give You a chance to heal me and to help my life. I know that this is the greatest opportunity so that I hear your voice, see your way, and let you heal me.
There is a lot sorrow in my heavy heart, and it s hard to carry it. There s a lot of sorrow, because whenever I remember the time me and my boyfriend were happy and loveful, I feel my heart breaking again and again. I m hopeless, because my situation is like this now more then a half year ago, and I couldn t step forward, I couldn t change anything even with my biggest tryings.
So now it s really hard, bcs I have no more energy, and my hope is vanishing.
But! Here I go, Jesus! I m here to listen to you. I m here to turn toward you! I m jere to give you my heart and let you heal it. I m here to find new hope in your words, to gather more energy. I m here to trust you, and believe, that you will find a way for my peace.
I can t force someone to love me. But I know that once he loved me with all of his heart. I know, Jesus, that you gave him that huge love he had for me.
I know that You have a reason why things are like this between us, and I know you just want my joy and peace with anything happens to me.
I don t know what is your plan with us, but I know, that anything happens is going to be the best for us. I know that you want me happiness, and you will ease my way anything happens.
Please give me more hope, and more joy, so that I believe that this problem is going to get resolved very soon. Please help me to love my spouse with all my heart purily, the best, how I can. Please warm up my heart so that it radiates such a great love toward my spouse what he always desired and what he deserves.
I really love him, and he is everything to me on this earth. Please give me so that I always want his best no matter what, without any selfhishness.
Please give me so that I love him so much that my heart be overwhelmed by this love I feel, because I know we can t ask someone to love us, but if we really love someone, we find the peace in that love.
Thank you, Jesus, that you listened my prayer, and thank you that I love very much my spouse. Thank you for biggening this love toward him from day by day. Thank you for washing out the sorrow from my heart. Thank you for the hope.